Toxic People and Childhood Trauma

woman carrying a baby

Dealing with toxic people and childhood trauma lead to me wanting to be a full-time stay-at-home wife and mama. Being a stay-at-home wife and mama is one of the hardest yet most rewarding jobs I have ever done. There are so many times when I doubted myself and thought that there is no way possible that I am good enough to be their mother. But then I remembered that God has chosen me to be their mama. He has chosen for me to be a stay-at-home wife and mama. This is his plan and I am just living it through him. Once I realized that I was put in this position for a reason my thoughts became clear and I am mesmerized.

I have had the pleasure to see all the firsts, all the hurts, and fixing all the mistakes. Some days, I see that what I am teaching my kids is going to make them happier and healthier people. In this house, we break generational curses, fix childhood traumas, and get rid of the toxic people who think they have leverage.

In past times people would allow toxic people in their lives because those people were blood and no matter how they treated you or others around you, no matter how their life choices affected you, no matter if they did something unspeakable they were still allowed to be involved. But in this house, we are not allowing that. We do not want any toxic person in our atmosphere, blood or not, and even if they are not blood we will love them as if they are. Life is too short to allow a toxic person or childhood traumas to control this life God has put here for us.

People fear losing their families even the toxic ones, little do they see that they are losing themselves more and opening themselves up to be taken advantage of, disrespected, or controlled. When you fend off those types of people and get them out of your life for good, you will then realize that they were the ones blocking you from shining bright and your light is too bright not to shine.

Do not let people’s need for control invade your lifestyle. Take charge and be the change. If you grew up with parents who weren’t around. Be the change, be there for your kids and make sure they know you are there for them. If you grew up with abusive parents. Be the change, and don’t let that go on to your kids, they deserve the love you wish you had. If you saw things your parents did that you don’t agree with. Be the change, don’t let whatever hurt you as a child move on to your generation of children or grandchildren. Playing the victim card is easy. Not taking responsibility for your actions is easy. Losing your temper is easy. Being self-absorbed is easy. Putting your feelings above your kid’s is easy. I never said the change was going to be easy. Just that it is so worth it and will make future generations happier and healthier. You are the only one who can make the change for yourselves and your children. You will struggle, you will have days you fail, and you will have moments of doubt, but persevere. I promise the end is worth it.

My husband and I have had a happier and less stressful marriage since we just started to focus on each other and our kids. We have been getting rid of the people who don’t actually care and don’t want us around. We get judged for not letting our kids go over to places but what others don’t understand is that this is my protective instinct, I can make sure my kids are being treated fairly instead of enduring everything we have been put through.

If you ask yourself how to find out who those people are in your life, think to yourself who brings the drama, who thinks the world spins for them and wants everything their way with no care about anyone else? Those are the people I am talking about they are soul-sucking, vibe killers and your instincts tell you to stay away. Don’t give them a second chance or a piece of your life. Once they get a sliver they will take that and run until there is nothing left for you besides hurt, pain, conflict, and hate.


Check out 10 reasons to start homeschooling today HERE!

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